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Some advice on improving this music video edit please.

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  • Some advice on improving this music video edit please.

    I am working on the edit of a music video and I'm moderately pleased with it but the band want changes and I know it could be better. Please watch the video and form your own thoughts and then read the rest of this post.

    (Please note this is not the final colour grade and I need to record the extra music coming from the laptop so it sounds like it's actually coming from the laptop... )

    Password: zuzu




    Now that you watched it did you understand that they are neighbours? How was the pacing? Could the first half have faster cuts? How about the ending did it work for you? Is the intro too long (personally I like strange music videos and think the length is perfect but the band thinks it's too long)

    I know I could have done better with the lighting. I wanted a flat brightly lit look for the singer on his own and I'm happy with what I got. I used a 1.2k HMI bounced against the back wall. But for the band I really stuffed up I think. The band were meant to be bringing some lamps and various lights and didn't and so I tried to make do with what I have and didn't really do a great job. I guess I'll do what I can in the grade.

    The most important thing I guess is the whole neighbours story thing. How can I make it clearer they are neighbours using only the footage I have? Make it colour and really play with that side of things? Some kind of split screen?

    Be honest I can take it.
    fluoro.com

  • #2
    i think it stands on its own the way it is. b/w is fine too, gives it that vintage feel.

    but i dont see how they are neighbors when it is the exact same apartment ;^) good job with the set dressing though!

    all joking aside, it is quite clear that they are next door neighbors.

    Comment


    • #3
      1. The intro is a little long and drags on just a tidge. But I get it, this guy who has nothing better to do on a saturday night wants to enjoy some piece and quiet.

      2. It would be nice to hear the neighbors voices coming through the walls until it cuts to them when they turn on the stereo system. Better establishment of where they are.

      3. The first half pacing is good. I would've like to see some more cuts to the beat of the music. More or less I like how the guy is annoyed at the start, trying to bang on the walls with no response.

      4. At 2:04 I would like to see it start to get it a little more chaotic as the guy is getting more and more frustrated(Faster cutting back and forth to the rowdies and the guy). Until he finally blows up and starts singing to the lyrics.

      5. At 4:00 I'd cut out the shot(MCU) of the guy falling and keep it on the wide instead.

      5. Split screen could be another option it would be interesting to see.

      Just experiment with it some more and you'll get there. I do like how you shot it, very strange indeed

      These are just my thoughts! Overall great job.
      Raynor Shima

      Producer at LuchaGore Productions / Twitter
      Skype: Rayinmotion

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by spinshot View Post
        i think it stands on its own the way it is. b/w is fine too, gives it that vintage feel.

        but i dont see how they are neighbors when it is the exact same apartment ;^) good job with the set dressing though!

        all joking aside, it is quite clear that they are next door neighbors.
        Okay thanks- good to hear it was obvious they are neighbours to at least one person. I wonder if it's completely obvious to the general viewer it's the same apartment? I was going for that identical apartment next to each other feel. I should have had drastically different lighting for the band shoot though- much more contrasty with lots of deep shadows. No light on in the kitchen etc. Oh well. Nothing like the pain of regret to spur one on.
        fluoro.com

        Comment


        • #5
          I actually didn't understand they were neighbors. I though they were walking into the other side of the room but it does take me a couple reads of a script to understand what the hell is going on

          I did think the intro could either be shorter or cut more. This was the first thing I thought before I even say your other comments. I actually followed your directions!

          I think you need to do 2 drastic grades to let us know were looking at different apartments since you couldn't do that on the day.

          I like the split screen idea a lot with different grades. Him on the the left and them on the right. That'll do it for sure.

          But I do think all your concerns or the bands concerns can be solved in editing and grade though, which is a good thing!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Rayinmotion View Post
            1. The intro is a little long and drags on just a tidge. But I get it, this guy who has nothing better to do on a saturday night wants to enjoy some piece and quiet.

            2. It would be nice to hear the neighbors voices coming through the walls until it cuts to them when they turn on the stereo system. Better establishment of where they are.

            3. The first half pacing is good. I would've like to see some more cuts to the beat of the music. More or less I like how the guy is annoyed at the start, trying to bang on the walls with no response.

            4. At 2:04 I would like to see it start to get it a little more chaotic as the guy is getting more and more frustrated(Faster cutting back and forth to the rowdies and the guy). Until he finally blows up and starts singing to the lyrics.

            5. At 4:00 I'd cut out the shot(MCU) of the guy falling and keep it on the wide instead.

            5. Split screen could be another option it would be interesting to see.

            Just experiment with it some more and you'll get there. I do like how you shot it, very strange indeed

            These are just my thoughts! Overall great job.
            Thanks for the detailed feedback! I'll certainly try your suggestions. I have to say the edit is hard because I have so much footage and options! I like the idea of the muffled sounds of the guys on the other side of the wall... Pity I didn't record them with anything better than the BMCC mic!
            fluoro.com

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by vicharris View Post
              I actually didn't understand they were neighbors. I though they were walking into the other side of the room but it does take me a couple reads of a script to understand what the hell is going on

              I did think the intro could either be shorter or cut more. This was the first thing I thought before I even say your other comments. I actually followed your directions!

              I think you need to do 2 drastic grades to let us know were looking at different apartments since you couldn't do that on the day.

              I like the split screen idea a lot with different grades. Him on the the left and them on the right. That'll do it for sure.

              But I do think all your concerns or the bands concerns can be solved in editing and grade though, which is a good thing!
              Thanks Vic! To be honest I thought I was being clever using the same apartment and flipping it. I thought it would add a bit of a surrealist twist to the video. I think it could have worked if I'd done a better job with set dressing and the lighting. Oh well. I'll try some split screen.
              fluoro.com

              Comment


              • #8
                I had a quick go seeing how the split screen would look Fluoro, definitely seems like you could pull it off, it's not the best perspective but it does add something else having the walls angled into each other. Tell me if you want to take a look at my quick and dirty try.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Isantasusi View Post
                  I had a quick go seeing how the split screen would look Fluoro, definitely seems like you could pull it off, it's not the best perspective but it does add something else having the walls angled into each other. Tell me if you want to take a look at my quick and dirty try.
                  Hey thanks I actually tried already and I know what you mean about the angled walls. I needed to shoot it differently for the best kind of split screen where it looks like you're actually looking into the two apartments down the middle of the joining wall. There might be a way around it to make split screen work for a couple of shots. i'll give it a go tomorrow.

                  Here is a split screen test I'd done before the shoot and perhaps I was on the right track but I decided not to use split screen... :

                  Screen Shot 2014-07-25 at 1.06.02 pm.jpg
                  fluoro.com

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    well here's my playing around-
                    http://youtu.be/JbnyMu4uAKA
                    I was thinking you use a more polished version of the idea as an intro shot, establishing in one movement that they are neighbors. (I was pretty lazy about it though, just a few minutes of work)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Isantasusi View Post
                      well here's my playing around-
                      http://youtu.be/JbnyMu4uAKA
                      I was thinking you use a more polished version of the idea as an intro shot, establishing in one movement that they are neighbors. (I was pretty lazy about it though, just a few minutes of work)
                      Thanks for the effort. That looks interesting. I'm not sure it solves the problem as it looks to me like it's transitioning to the same room maybe at a later time of night? Hmmm.

                      Please if anyone else watches this video please let me know whether you could tell if they were neighbours or not.
                      fluoro.com

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Yes it was quite obvious they were neighbours, but you could do a few things better:
                        1. Get him up & banging on the wall quicker - not so much hands through the hair stuff.
                        2. When he bangs on the wall, use splitscreen to re-enforce the neighbour part - you could use this a few times through out.
                        3. Try making the shots match - so if you use a wide shot for one side, cut to a wide shot on the other.
                        4. Also, when he starts to sing then you should go splitscreen completely & try to match him singing with the band pretending to play or singing.

                        What did the band not like about it?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Bioskop.Inc View Post
                          Yes it was quite obvious they were neighbours, but you could do a few things better:
                          1. Get him up & banging on the wall quicker - not so much hands through the hair stuff.
                          2. When he bangs on the wall, use splitscreen to re-enforce the neighbour part - you could use this a few times through out.
                          3. Try making the shots match - so if you use a wide shot for one side, cut to a wide shot on the other.
                          4. Also, when he starts to sing then you should go splitscreen completely & try to match him singing with the band pretending to play or singing.

                          What did the band not like about it?
                          Thanks very helpful!

                          The band said they were generally happy with it but that it was hard to detect the narrative of them being neighbours, the intro is too long, that the very ending drops in energy (not sure I understand this), that the second half has more energy in the cut (which makes sense to me but I guess I can spice things up in the first half), and that overall there are too many long shots.

                          Well now I'm off to start the new edit...
                          fluoro.com

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